Bra-dyssey, D.I.Y. style

This post was inspired by Auntlyh's recent bra-buying spree at Nordstrom's. While it contains no graphic details, it is certainly going to be convoluted, and may be of no interest to anyone but Auntly. So, if bra shopping is not your cup of tea, come back soon when I rant and rave about the usual nonsense.

After reading how Auntly went from a 36B to a 32D in 15 seconds flat after visiting a real department store bra fitter, I thought what every woman who read her post thought: "Damn, I bet I am wearing the wrong size."

But unlike Auntly I just couldn't put myself at the mercy of the sales ladies. Because they were going to show me undergarments with price tags that were going to make me cringe, and after they had just measured me I could hardly decline to buy something.

So I set out to measure myself and purchase my bras on the web. The process was comical, but I did learn a few things:

1. I have never really had a set bra size, but lately I've been wearing a 34A. I was actually a 32 band size. Which I would have never believed if it hadn't happened to Auntly first. I thought you gave up being a 32 when you gave up reading Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret.

2. If you want an inflated cup size, go to Linda's Bra School. The Wonderbra calulator ended up being right on, but it was one full cup size bigger than I had measured myself.

3. It's advisable to buy a bra that fits on the tightest set of hooks because it will stretch.

I decided to head to Marshall's to see if they had some sizes I could try one on in anonymity.

Sadly, I had Lucy with me. I can tell you that the trip did not take very long because there were only two 32Bs and one 32C to try on. The 32B fit OK, but the 32C fit really well. It was made by Wacoal and cost $10 (plus one Groovy Girl Mermaid at $5.99 for Lucy). Sold!

I was still not convinced that I bought the right size, so over the next two days I visited two more T.J. Maxx stores, where I ended up clearing the racks of every size 32C. Hardly a shopping spree, but I now own five bras. I guess I don't have to buy everything online.

I probably never would have tried the larger bras on if Auntly hadn't written about her experience. I would have just kept wearing my two stretched out, ill-fitting ones for at least another year. I also realize that my body hasn't changed one bit. Put me in a t-shirt and jeans and I still look pretty much like a ten year old boy. And as much as I prefer to point, click, and wait for the UPS man, I think it really helped to try them on first.

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Now playing: Rilo Kiley - Smoke Detector

I have a mandolin, I play it all night long...

Last night Cary took the kids to a St. Joseph's Day table at our friends' house. Our friends had hired a band - two musicians in their eighties- to play at the party. According to Cary, Henry plopped down in front on the band with a huge grin on his face. The mandolin player came up and handed his instrument to Henry, who started to play it, and the guitarist did his best to play along.

This morning at breakfast I said, "Henry, Daddy said you really liked the band last night." He replied, "You got the story a little bit wrong, Mom. I played with the band."

I skipped out on the event because I've had a terrible cold. It turned out to be a wise choice because Lucy woke up in the middle of the night with a fever, and I was up with her off and on all night.

Should be playing "100,000 Fireflies" by The Magnetic Fields, but I am posting from the laptop and it's not in iTunes on this machine.

Boy next door makes pants

I'm really excited to have a Staff Favorite on the Venus website today. Check it here.

What's fun about this piece is that I have known Matt, half of Swrve, since I was in first grade when we were about the only kids living in the same apt. complex. We used to get together and play with Matchbox cars.


I remember that he could always make me laugh. Somehow it doesn't surprise me at all that he went on to start his own DIY clothing company. They were even featured in the NYT last year.

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Now playing: The Breeders - Bang On

What I learned on the streets

If you lock your keys in your car at your daughter's pre-school it will take AAA over an hour to arrive, but less than 45 seconds to unlock your car.

Client 9

I do not accept your apology, Gov. Spitzer. I voted for you.

If you haven't already heard, read what the NYT has to say here.

I will now resume my regular blog programming: I have a migraine, and I am searching the house for a three-dimensional rhombus and something that is "not a polygon" so that Henry can complete his homework.

Newer Dumb Things

1. I packed a sandwich for Cary in his lunch that contained two-week old deli turkey. This was in no way intentional -- and thankfully he did not get sick! I didn't even notice until I went to add the fresh turkey I had just purchased to the fridge that we actually had two packages from previous weeks that I had failed to throw out, and I had made his sandwich from the oldest one. Now, you might ask, "What if Cary made his own lunches?" The outcome would have, in all likelihood, been the same.

2. Last week I called the cable company and announced to them that I had failed to put a check in the envelope along with my payment coupon. OK, no problem. We did an e-check over the phone and I felt slightly silly until yesterday when the bill was returned to me. I had put the payment coupon in upside down and backwards, so the Postal Service couldn't read the address, BUT I had also included a check This lead me to panic and think that I had not sent the credit card company a check. After calling, hearing that we owed no money at this time I decided to do what I should have done in the first place -- scrutinize the check register. Actually I just skipped ahead and wrote down the number so it looked like a check was missing, but everything was fine all along. I'd like to point out that I also use Quicken to do all of the math for the bills, or we would never have a balanced check book.


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Now playing: LCD Soundsystem - Disco Infiltrator (Fk's Infiltrated Vocal)

Jeff Tweedy's Migraines

The New York Times continues its valiant effort to offer up comments from more famous and interesting migraine sufferers. So considering migraines and music are two of my favorite non-kid topics, I would be remiss if I didn't link to what Jeff Tweedy has to say.

After reading it myself I have two comments. No one has ever offered me Vicodin for my headaches - as he says it worked no better than Imitrex. It completely amazes me that most of his headaches are now treatable with Advil. One thing I have learned by reading these accounts is that we migraineurs are a heterogeneous bunch. Also, I have had headaches two out of the last three days.

Obligatory Henry update: Things seem to be going better. Nowhere to go but up, right? The school psychologist, who appears to be competent and helpful, and somewhat contrite, has gotten involved working with his teacher more directly. We shall see. I am not going to pat anyone on the back just yet.

My favorite Wilco song: Jesus, etc. from Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, which preceded Tweedy's detox.

Interesting side note - it is now easier for me to post songs than to link to what I am listening to because I can no longer open iTunes without crashing the computer after installing our router and linking to TiVo. Ironically, I can listen to all my music through my TV.

Digging Out

A few good things have happened that have helped take my mind off of how upset I have been.

1. I realized that I may be willing to consider selling our house and moving to a different school district, or taking a menial job to fund a private school education for Henry, but I draw the line at home schooling him. That's kind of funny on some level.

2. At swimming Henry's teacher (and sometimes babysitter) was absent. He got put in a random group that included Lucy and about 8 other kids (too big!). He perceived this as a slight. He climbed out of the pool, found the buffoon in charge, explained the situation -- we could see a couple of tears while he was talking but there was no tantrum-- and got himself put in a new, smaller group. He had a fantastic lesson. Six months ago he never could have done that.

3. If anyone is curious about my first printed review in Venus you can read it here. They didn't put every single review up on the web from the last issue, but they chose mine. While this may be the tiniest indication of praise, I'm clinging to it.

4. I spent a good part of yesterday getting ready to work on what the school laughingly refers to as "a family project." We were supposed to create a time line of our child's life, which they claim somehow ties in with their Math curriculum. Hurray! My first idea was to do a version of Chutes and Ladders, but I rejected that because I can't draw very well and because I didn't think the school would appreciate how I placed a gigantic chute at the beginning of every school year. I settled on doing a clock because I could leave the "hours" from 7 on empty, and we could look to the future.

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Now playing: The Books - The Future, Wouldn't That Be Nice?

Low Point

Yesterday was one of the worst days that I can remember. When I think about how good I felt holding Henry in my arms when we left the hospital with him, how wholly excited and positive the experience was, and where we are now, it breaks my heart.

The teacher told the principal that she has no idea why he would suddenly attack her like that, and that there is no explanation. I have an explanation, but no one wants to listen. The teacher, while very kind and well-meaning, is inexperienced and Henry walks all over her. He also adores her, but he knows if he refuses to do work she just sends it home with him. She is so afraid that he will get upset in her classroom (and make her look bad) that she just squelches any problem before it starts, so Henry never learns to deal with things. Cary has given her very specific instructions about what to do in these situations, but she chooses not to use his advice.

The work that made him so angry was a coloring book. He told me, "I feel like I color every piece of work I do." And it isn't far from the truth. He is sick of coloring and I don't blame him. He is bored. Obviously that is no excuse for injuring your teacher, but no one at the school picked up on the significance of this and to me and Cary it was so obvious. The principal said, "We don't understand, she's asked him to do much more challenging things before." Now I don't understand what it is in Henry that makes it so hard to push past the thought that he doesn't want to do something, but it troubles me that no one recognizes that it is ridiculous how much these kids color, yet they never get a true break. His teacher prides herself on making them work through snack. She's taking them sledding today so they can use the material for a "non-fiction writing experience." (Henry can't go sledding because of yesterday. How much do you want to bet it is going to be a problem when it comes time for the writing piece to be done too).

And I don't just think the teacher's inexperience is to blame. The school knew that Henry was difficult even before he was enrolled and they insist on placing him with inappropriate teachers, and then take NO responsibility for this. Why they would give a kid who struggled behaviorally last year to the brand new teacher, and give her all of the ESL kids (most of whom are very bright - but that doesn't make them easy) is beyond me.

Could it be that the more experienced teachers and the parents who are very involved in the school have the clout to demand each other? Sadly, that will never be me.

I am left feeling like we have made choices as a family like buying a house in a school district with very high taxes that was supposed to be excellent, and now I don't know whether to yank my kid out, or move, or what.

Of course he won't, no not until the next time...

1. I filled up the gas tank to the sounds of Lucy's screams because I wouldn't let her come out of the car and join me. It is 10 degrees outside! When I got back in the car she said, "I can taste my tears, Mama."

2. I brought in the mail and discovered that my mother-in-law had mailed my birthday card three days late and failed to put enough postage on it, so I got it today and my mail carrier requested that I put $0.17 in an envelope. Happy Birthday to me!

3. But the kicker is that I got a phone call from the Administrative Assistant (i.e. Vice Principal) at Henry's school this morning. He was in her office because apparently he refused to do work (AGAIN), this time it was a coloring book about hippos. She told me that he was pretending to cut his arm with the scissors, so the teacher needed to take the scissors from him and when she tried to do this he poked the teacher in the stomach with the scissors.

We have been working so hard with him at home to improve his behavior and he has been doing really well, but obviously we pushed him too hard. I haven't really talked to Henry yet, so I am not assuming that he meant to hurt the teacher, whom he adores, but I wish I understood why he had such a hard time doing the work they give him. Admittedly it is mind-numbing, but it isn't like he can't do it. I am at a total loss.

4. All of which makes the arrival of the newest VenusZine with another printed contribution by me feel pretty meaningless.

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Now playing: The Smiths - Sweet and Tender Hooligan

A mix of the wrong and right

but hopefully all is at least mildly amusing:

1. Yesterday I stood in our driveway just in time to see Henry's afternoon bus drive right by the house without stopping to let off any kids! It turned out that the (substitute) driver didn't know where to stop and actually yelled at the kids (a third-grader and two first-graders) for not telling her where to let them off. My neighbor had to call the school, who called the bus garage, who radioed the driver, who said "she realized she still had some extra kids and would be turning around."

2. Lucy had her two stuffed ponies inform me that there was going to be "a pony contest in Lucy's room." I sat on Lucy's bed while she threw each pony into the air. Then she announced they had both won a ribbon.

3. We seem to have accidentally cured Henry of his addiction to playing the Flash version of Nintendo games (on the internet) by purchasing a router and hooking our TiVo to the computer. Now he is fascinated with what he calls "this new TiVo." And he asks if he can listen to podcasts when he finishes his homework. He doesn't know that podcasts are available on the computer, so please, don't tell him.

4. Henry was eating a Popsicle for desert tonight. Lucy wanted one too, but Cary said basically dared her to eat a bite of sweet potato first. She did it! Then she got her Popsicle but soon gave up eating it because it was too cold. She asked me for a warmer Popsicle.

5. I'd like to be listening to music as I post, like maybe the new Los Campesinos, or the new Duke Spirit, but I can't get iTunes to open.

In Brief

Parenting is a humbling experience. That is all.

More of the same

What I did today:
1. Cleaned up dried vomit from Henry's rug, sheets, pillow, and comforter again.
2. A lot of vacuuming, starting in Henry's room.
3. Actually showered without interference or assistance of any kind from Lucy.

What I did not do:
1. Sleep past 5:20 a.m. (Thanks to Lucy, who is now asleep on a chair in front of the TV).
2. Get out of my pajamas before 11:00 a.m.
3. Leave the house.

Henry has all of next week off from school. My house is going to be really, really clean.

The Wrong Kind of Work

So I'm fresh out of writing assignments today. Plus Henry caught Lucy's cold and has been home for two days, so I have only left the house to deposit the Valentine's day party supplies at his classroom today. I have actually found myself cleaning out of boredom, and this frightens me.

There are a lot of other things I could be doing, like reading one of the three engrossing articles the NYT has printed recently on migraine, only I have discovered that the children do a better job of entertaining themselves if I appear to be busy and sitting at the computer quietly does not meet that definition. Maybe my neurologist is reading them. Hmm, prolly no. The comments alone are amazing. I highly recommend them to anyone else with chronic headaches.

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Now playing: Field Music - Working To Work

I might have to hire a sitter in 22 to 30 months

I was considering another post where I lament the constant presence in my life of seemingly endless games of Chutes and Ladders, No Child Left Behind-inspired math homework, and bitterly cold temperatures.

Instead, I have some good news for a change. Amazing how it has nothing to do with my daily life, except that it might get me out of the house when it hits the big screen.

This is from the PowellBooks blog:

Even the staunchest critics of book to film adaptation have to admit — this is something to look forward to.

With the upcoming film version of The Yiddish Policemen's Union, Michael Chabon will be the next Pulitzer Prize-winning author to have his work adapted by the filmmaking wonder-twins, Joel and Ethan Coen.

The entire time I was reading this book I kept picturing it as a movie. They'd better not screw up the casting or I might just have to write a cranky post about it.

Mixed Bag

What I did yesterday:
1. Got up with Lucy three times before 6 a.m.
2. Washed and dried and folded five loads of laundry.
3. Nodded off during Ni Hao, Kai-Lan.
4. Turned in a review.
5. Took Henry back to school to pick up his homework folder.
a. I discovered that he has been put at a table with the two worst behaved boys in the class. This infuriates me because it does nothing to help him concentrate (his teacher's main complaint about him and these two boys are loud) or make friends. Plus it makes me feel like she just lumped him in with her other two problems.
b. On the way back to the van Henry intentionally stepped in an inch of mud, then slipped when he was trying to clean his boots off in the snow, then when I said, "GET IN THE CAR" he decided to try and climb in on Lucy's side, planning to spread mud across her and the entire back seat.

What I did not do yesterday:
1. Shower
2. Make it to the gym (Lucy was up because she has a cold).
3. Take Henry back to school to hear some random story teller at his school from 6:45-9:00 tonight.
4. Manage to post this sorry list on the day it actually happened.

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Now playing: LCDremixed.com - Time To Get Away (ATOM's Exit Stage Left Mix)

Pulling the Lever

Lucy and I just got back from voting. Hurrah!

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Now playing: Urban Legends - 01. Beneath Emotions And Politic

I need to sleep for a week

1. Yesterday Lucy demanded her first manicure. Actually she asked for "nail goulash," but I think we both knew she meant polish. I think I might have finally figured out a way to keep her from moving.

2. Henry came home from school today and he had apparently refused to finish (or even start) all of his math class work, a small coloring book, and his Weekly Reader activities. So we spent an hour and 45 minutes on homework today. Every time Lucy made the slightest noise while she played with her toys, he plugged his ears and said, "I can't take all this noise!" (Usually when he does homework she gets right in our faces and demands things like juice and lollipops, so today she was actually being really, really good.)

3. He goes to see the Buffalo Philharmonic with the entire first grade in Thursday (what could go wrong there, right?), so if I don't post for awhile just assume I've finally taken the plunge and gotten myself a sensory deprivation chamber.

4. I've got a new review up at Venus. Check it.

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Now playing: The Helio Sequence - broken_afternoon

Thoughts About Vampire Weekend.

Required reading: The VenusZine review (not mine)
Required prereq listening: Graceland -- one of my favorite records of all time. (Christ, it just occurred to me that there are people who will think of Elvis' home before they think of Paul Simon's record).

1. Their name is about the worst mismatch for their sound that I have ever encountered.

2. They confirm that I chose to attend the wrong Ivy League School. But I have that thought about five times a day. I sincerely hope that it is not the last thing I think when I die.

3. Their music conjures up what I thought college would be like, but wasn't, straight out of The Preppy Handbook . If this is khaki-core (Matt Siblo, did you coin this term? Google seems to think so), then I say bring me more, and get me a Bloody Mary while you are at it. The music is so upbeat without being vapid and the band generates this feeling of happiness. It kind of makes me ache inside.

4. My current favorite track is "Oxford Comma" -- I feel like a giddy school girl, "who gives a fuck about an Oxford Comma?" It's like they are singing to me. Would that I were 15 years younger...

5. This is a record that sounds pretty good to me now, but I suspect that in two months I will be completely unable to listen to it, which is right around the time Cary will start to think it's great.

Vampire Weekend - "Oxford Comma"

P.S. This is my 200th post.

P.P.S.
According to Stereogum, they also played at Other Music today:


Sadly my day did not include running out to any in-store performances of up-and-coming indie rockers, but I did go out and buy some eggs.

Yet another long weekend in more ways than one...

1. Lucy has had a cold for the last several days, complaining that her throat and her stomach hurt. She spent most of yesterday on the couch staring at episodes of Sponge Bob with glassy eyes.

2. Cary also spent the latter half of the day in bed because he injured himself moving all his furniture to his new office last weekend. He went to urgent care because he was so uncomfortable, and the doctor there told him that he essentially has an abdominal hernia, though it is not large enough to "concern a surgeon." Cary seems a little better though, because he just left for work.

3. When I woke up the morning I thought the house seemed freezing, and guess what, it was! Our thermostat's batteries had given out during the night, a night where I think it got down to about 3 degrees. When I put in fresh batteries I learned that it was only 52 degrees in the house. But I am really grateful that it was a simple fix like that, and the heat is currently cranked, so we should warm up in no time.

4. I've got a new Trouser Press entry up for Feist. I think this was the first time I have ever written about anyone whose popularity was skyrocketing (iPod commercial, Grammy nominations, numerous mainstream TV appearances) while I wrote.

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Now playing: Feist - When I Was A Young Girl (Live)

And now for 2008 ...

I just remembered that Head Like a Kite, the Seattle-based duo that released my second favorite record of 2006 (and the best random promo I have ever received), is releasing a new record this April. I don't foresee ever removing this record from my iPod because I don't think I could ever get tired of listening to it.

The new Sons and Daughters, This Gift, sounds promising if the KEXP podcast is any indication. I'm also pretty curious about the next Man Man album, also arriving in April. And then there's that Breeders record which I face with say 80% dread (Bam Thwok?) and 20% hope.

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Now playing: Head Like A Kite - Pour Me A Drink!

Like Lazarus

my iPod is risen! I think my battery problem stemmed from having left it in the car overnight. It seems fine now. I did also learn that I cannot replace my own battery because it is a Nano and the battery is soldered to the motherboard. Indeed.

And Jen14221 is totally right - I computed days per dollar not dollars per day, so the true cost per day if my iPod had died would have been 36 cents a day, which is so much more reasonable. Thank god my life does not depend on my ability to do arithmetic. I would be so dead.

Something else has risen up too -- it's my 2007 top ten! (Because January 14th '08 is seriously the last possible day I could have done this, and anyone who knows anything does it before Pitchfork anyway).

It turns out there were only five records I liked enough to include:

1. Of Montreal -- Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer?
2. Jens Lekman -- Night Falls Over Kortedala
3. LCD Soundsystem -- Sound of Silver
4. St. Vincent -- Marry Me
5. Menomena -- Friend and Foe


It wasn't like there wasn't a lot of good music to listen to in 2007, but like my pal Mr. Parnell over at "SLE," a lot of it didn't reach my expectations.

MIA, Band of Horses, Arcade Fire, Voxtrot, White Stripes, Fiery Furnaces, Rilo Kiley, Mary Timony, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah -- I paid money for all of your CDs and they weren't half as interesting as catching Ghostland Observatory on Austin City Limits or listening to Prinzhorn Dance School rip off the Fall better than anyone else in recent memory. I don't think I have recovered yet from the Feist record either, but that isn't really her fault.

!!!, Life Without Buildings and the Shins were legitimate also-rans, but those records don't have the staying power that my top five did.

I also have to mention that my favorite Metric album of all time Grow Up and Blow Away technically came out this year, but since it dates back to like 2001 I can't really put it on my list. Ditto that remix record by The Blow -- I liked it, but it was hardly new. And the Datarock record fits in that category too, sort of.

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Now playing: Of Montreal - Cato as Pun

Ich Habe Genug

A while back the lovely Auntlyh tagged me for a book meme, which I'm finally getting around to doing.

I don't read as much as I used to (i.e. before I had kids) but I do have a couple of things going. Yesterday I read The Principles of Uncertainty, the wonderful book by illustrator and New York Times columnist Maira Kalman. I read it in one day because it's a picture book for grown ups! (Take heed parents of young ones, you need not read only sleep manuals any longer.) It was a Christmas gift from my mother. Originally the book had appeared in installments on the New York Times website, behind the (now defunct) Times Select firewall, so I was excited to have a chance to finally read it.

According to the meme I am supposed to quote the fifth sentence on page 161. Alas, I have but one sentence to quote, "The pinky pink paté that totally wipes out the last vestige of malaise."

This was a great book, like a trip through Kalman's lovely mind -- cluttered and concerned. My favorite quote is from page 197:

On the wall was a dress that I embroidered. It said "Ich Habe Genug." Which is a Bach Cantata. Which I once thought meant "I've had it, I can't take anymore, give me a break." But I was wrong. It means "I have enough." And that is utterly true.

I love how the simple misreading of "I've had enough" turns into "I have enough." Can I be allowed to feel both at once?

I'm not tagging anyone. I know some of you out there do like to read, so if this interests you, please feel free to carry on.


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Now playing: The Shins - Pressed In A Book

My iPod, R.I.P.

Today I went into the gym, got ready to start listening to some Ghostland Observatory, only to find my iPod was totally dead. It's not really broken; it just needs a new battery.

I have had my iPod for a mere 695 days. At a cost of $250.00 that breaks down to $2.78 per day. That is a pricey habit. But guess what, I'm going to find a way to keep the fix going.

My mom's iPod gave out at almost exactly the same point in its life. She did some research and learned that if you return your iPod to Apple for a new battery they charge $59 and send you a different iPod back to you in its place. So she went here and bought a battery replacement kit, then she and my dad changed the battery themselves, and it worked like new.

I may well do the same. I will keep you all posted. But for now let me say that being forced to listen to the gym's choice in music, and overhear other people's conversations may well be worth $2.78 a day.

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Now playing: Ghostland Observatory - Piano Man

I've been busy...

During the afternoon of the 31st I took Lucy to a birthday party at a neighbor's house where I child I never met before required me to shepherd her to the toilet so she could vomit. She then informed me that "she had been at the doctor's that morning because she had been throwing up."

When we got home I left my keys in the front door until I needed them 24 hours later. Convenient.

And it took me an extra day to post these shenanigans.

Happy New Year!

Ho Ho hopeless

1. Both kids are home with terrible colds today. Henry stayed home yesterday (he and I spent most of the day running errands together during a snow storm), and I decided to give him one more day to recover. Then Lucy woke up stuffy and whiny. Her condition remains unchanged.

2. The online photo place that delivers to Wegmans lost my Christmas pictures. I placed the order on Monday night, and when they still hadn't arrived yesterday I called the store. Someone in Wegman's photo department directed me to the photolab's "Customer Success" department (I'm not kidding, that's really what they called it) where I was informed that my pictures should have arrived in the store at 10 a.m. this morning. But they didn't. And all they could do was offer me 15 free prints and let me place the order again. I declined.

I placed the order through Snapfish and am picking up the prints from Walgreens later today. I didn't do this in the first place because last time I got prints from Snapfish and Wegmans simultaneously the Snapfish ones were hideous.

So, if I you get a hideous picture of my kids (and me and Cary, if you happen to be named LHM) don't blame me!

That is all.

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Now playing: The Affair - Red And White

Somehow this cheered me, particularly the comments section

This quote is directly from IvyGate (I'm too exhausted to come up with my own post tonight):

"Last night, between 10pm and 3am, the freshmen of the Ezra Stiles college at Yale constructed a massive christmas light penis on the front of Lawrance as a response to the traditional christmas light "JE SUX" written across the front of Farnum, the adjacent dorm. The penis was estimated to be about 100 feet long, and even sported multi-colored, blinking ejaculate. The penis will ostensibly remain on Lawrance through the end of finals (next week)."

I guess I'm glad to have a picture of my former home (I think I can see the light from the room where I lived as a Freshman Counselor about mid-way up the shaft), and glad to know that ES still lives in Lawrence.

I wonder if I will ever post anything about college not lifted directly from IvyGate ... probably not. Which means I am currently leaning against going to my upcoming reunion. If you are still reading this then I would rather just visit you instead.

Emergency Ramones Requisition

Henry declared his new favorite song was "number 19" on an old CMJ sampler that Cary had. It turns out to be a little tune called "Marijuana Motherfucker" by D.O.A.

I never thought I would feel the need to censor my son's musical tastes, but at six years old he has already gotten the best of me. We promptly burned him a Ramones CD (so much better than D.O.A. but with the same high energy that he liked), and made the CMJ sampler disappear. At least now when his teacher asks him his favorite song, he can give an answer that won't fill me with complete dread.

In the interest of full disclosure "Now I wanna sniff some glue" and "Beat on the brat" are not on Henry's copy. Not yet.

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Now playing: The Ramones - now I wanna sniff some glue

When am I gonna get that vacation?

One really good thing did happen yesterday: Lucy wrote her name for the first time.

Otherwise the day was endless.

1. I took Lucy to a playgroup at an overpriced gymnastics play space which she loves, only to find out that I had been told the wrong time and we were two hours late. She cried.

2. I received not one, but two, calls from the school yesterday regarding Henry's behavior. Apparently at one point during a study of Hanukkah he wrote "Merry Christmas" on the back of his paper, got up out of his seat, and tried to walk around the room to show the other students. He refused to go back to his seat on the grounds that he "just wanted to spread holiday cheer."

3. Finally, as I was ready to put Lucy to sleep last night we discovered that Sufi had vomited up two hair balls on her comforter.

Maybe we are turning things around. This morning Henry woke, showered, and dressed himself. Attempted to write out a Googol on a piece of paper while I dressed Lucy. I think there are 100 zeroes. He filled both sides of a piece of paper, so he may be close. He ate breakfast without argument. And got on his coat and shoes on his own without prompting. I rewarded his good behavior by allowing him to take a chunk of a huge icicle from our roof to the bus stop because that is what he begged me for.

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Now playing: Xiu Xiu - Clowne Towne

Das Boot

Henry has homework everyday day, which I will never accept, because he is only in 1st grade. Some days it takes him 15 minutes, but some days we spend over an hour on the work depending on what got sent home.

On Tuesday he brought home a sheet of paper with a photocopied shoe. All of the directions were in German. After some guessing it was clear he was supposed to color the shoe, cut it out, fold it here and there, and voila, a 3-D shoe. WTF! If it is so important that it is worth sending home, then isn't it important enough to give us some directions?

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Now playing: Feist - When I Was A Young Girl (VV Mix)

Alarmingly funny

Cary and I each have our own clock radios. I suspect this arrangement is fairly common among married folks who don't get up at exactly the same time.

Recently the snooze button on my Sony dream machine (purchased at Brand Names circa 1992) has started to go. This is a problem since the snooze button is about the only part of the dream machine that still gets any use.

But more amusingly, Cary's alarm, which is much newer, just changed ON ITS OWN from a regular beeping sound to a sound that I can only describe as a fakey French police siren. Plus it is really loud. Now every time his alarm goes off I just start laughing. I'm not sure if this is an improvement or not, but I do know that even if I sleep through my own alarm there is no chance I will sleep through his ever again.
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Now playing: Belle and Sebastian - Sleep the Clock Around (Black)

Marching Orders

Lucy has a new funny habit at bedtime. She has started ordering me to leave the house. As soon as I mention it's time to head upstairs she says, "I want you to water your plants and go to the store."

Never mind that my garden plants are all dormant for winter and could really use a good clean up more an a watering.

She's been doing this now for over two weeks. At first she would tell me what to buy: vegetables, ingredients for fruit salad (I blame the Wiggles), or a Pineapple. The day she asked for the pineapple she woke up the next morning demanding to see it. I had to tell her they were all out of pineapple at the store.

If I tell her I have to go finish up the dishes as I am turning out her light (which is usually true) she will scream, "No! Go the store! Water your plants!"

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Now playing: Patrick Wolf - Secret Garden

In Print

If you want to check out my latest contribution to Venuszine, you'll have to pony up for a copy from your nearest bookseller. The winter issue goes on sale everywhere December first, and my review of the Scotland Yard Gospel Choir is contained it its pages, along with the 2007 Hott list, and a D.I.Y. gift guide.

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Now playing: The Scotland Yard Gospel Choir - Aspidistra

You are all invited for dinner!

It's a happy day in our household because we finally replaced our old kitchen table (given to us free by my in-laws, and purchased circa '73). I guess I owe that jerk from Craigslist a thank you, because if he had sold us his table we never would have ended up with one this nice.
Henry picked out a special meal from foodtv.com for me to cook tonight. We had to wait over a month for the table to arrive because Cary found it in an online shop in Phoenix, but it was definitely worth the wait. Now I just have to get used to hauling out the vinyl tablecloth when the kids want to color or paint -- good thing I saved this one.
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Now playing: Feist - Flight #303

It was another very long weekend

1. I visited Henry's classroom on Friday afternoon because he was going to read aloud to the class. He did, and it was cute. But I learned from his teacher that he had refused to cooperate during the math testing she needed to do with him, for his report card. Could we stay after school so she could finish up? What else could I say. Thanks, Henry, for keeping me after school. It may have been the first time but I'm sure it won't be the last.

2. We went to the hockey game with some friends on Friday night, which was pretty fun even though the Sabres lost 3-0. I miss Briere. The sitter left Lucy's door open, so Cary closed it. The next morning she was locked in her room. It took me at least twenty minutes to jimmy the mechanism inside that pops the lock because I forgot you have to turn the knob while you are pushing on the thingy inside that releases the lock. Lucy was terrified and she now has trouble sleeping in her bed. We have to go to an auction at her pre-school tonight and my parents have to put her to sleep. I am very afraid for them.

3. Cary took the kids outside to rake on Sunday and I thought I would get a jump on folding the laundry. When I opened the dryer I found a crayon had melted all over the clothes. Thank god it was a dark load. The only thing that got ruined was a pair of Henry's swim trunks. But the inside of my brand new dryer, the one that doesn't eat clothing, and I just paid off two weeks ago, is now covered in blue crayon. Maybe it will serve as a permanent reminder to check the kid's pockets before I start a load of laundry. Probably not.

4. I forgot to mention the "family turkey" that the school sent home for us to decorate as a family. It consisted of two pieces of paper that we had to glue together, and then fill in with whatever we felt like (we chose old bits of wrapping paper). Needless to say I did not force Cary to participate, and Lucy's participation was equal to crying and grabbing for the glue stick. Thanks school, for adding some great togetherness time to my week.

Too wrong to ignore

I don't normally comment on the goings on outside my insular world, but when Cary mentioned that Aquadots were recalled because swallowing even one dot could send a child into a coma because the coating breaks down into a date rape drug, I had to post something. Lucy has been begging me for these, and I have refused on the grounds that I didn't want to chase a million tiny plastic balls around the kitchen.

You can read CNN's take on the story, and just in case you have some in your household, here is the CPSC recall info. According to CPSC, 4.2 million units have already been sold. Yikes.

This Christmas I'm going to get my kids an unpainted hoop and stick.

A nice ending to an endless day

Lucy was watching Dora on TV today when Dora asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I heard Lucy say, "I want to be my Mama!"

At bedtime, I wanted to see if she would repeat the phrase for Cary, so I asked her the same question and got the same answer. She kept repeating, "I want to be you, Mom."

Then she demanded that I sing her an original song about snow before she would go to sleep.

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Now playing: Jens Lekman - Your Arms Around Me

VenusZine rising!

Venus just launched its new website today, and the new site is more user friendly. Pretty soon readers will be able to sign in and comment. Plus a radio station is in the works too. Best of all, for me, it looks like none of my old reviews got deleted. Sweet!

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Now playing: Moonbabies - Cocobelle

There's gotta be a pony in here somewhere...

1. Yesterday started off as Henry burst into tears because I removed the "top crust" of his toast, in addition to all other sides. He tried to convince me to make the toast again, but because the bus was coming in precisely 4 minutes he begrudgingly agreed to eat it.

2. Lucy cried for 40 minutes in the afternoon because Henry was using the computer. When I tried to play Chutes and Ladders with her she continued to move her pieces all over the board making free use of the chutes or ladders when it wasn't her turn. When I tried to play Candyland with her she would only move to spaces that were green because she had chosen a green game piece.

3. The dude at the vintage furniture store blew me off for the third time. We bought a Heywood Wakefield Buffet from him on October 13th and he still hasn't delivered it. No wonder his delivery fee is so cheap.

4. After dinner Lucy said her stomach hurt. She had diarrhea.

5. As a result of Lucy being sick were unable to bring ourselves to eat a second slice of the amazing apple caramel pie that he bought on Sunday from Butterwood.

6. And Lucy missed her Halloween party at pre-school today, plus finally a chance to go to her friend Macy's house.


7. The pony in the pile of manure, I mean, our new buffet, was delivered this morning. Here is a picture. Oh, and Henry got his toast with the top crust, so maybe we've turned our luck around.

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Now playing: The Helio Sequence - Just Mary Jane (Calypso)

Loo loo loo I've got some apples, loo loo loo you've got some too...

So I thought my day was off to a good start because Henry didn't fight me when it was time to wake up in the morning. It turns out it was just because he has wet his bed.

Which got me to thinking, if Henry was a South Park character he would definitely be Butters. I say this because his father has yet to teach him to pee standing up without pulling his pants down completely. In first grade this is not an issue because the children have their own bathroom but come next year I don't want my kid standing there at the urinal with his pants around his ankles. Apparently I am the only person in the house that thinks this is of any importance. I suppose I could teach him myself, but is this really necessary when there is already a grown man living here with way more experience in such matters than I will ever have?

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Now playing: Morrissey - I Just Want To See The Boy Happy

Someone please cheer me up.

I haven't posted because nothing suitably wrong has happened of late, and when I start to consider an anecdote about letting the cat out by mistake, or ordering Henry infant shoes online thinking they were youth size 2 I think about Auntlyh's dear departed dog, Loyd or the fires in San Diego and I don't have much to say.

Anne and I both independently checked in on CJD, our friend in San Diego, and were glad to learn she is fine.

In an effort to cheer myself I am going to try to remember the alternate lyrics to a Kappa song that LHM was mostly, if not fully, responsible for writing for CJD. CJD was a confirmed teatotaller, and didn't like the established version, so we used to sing this one to her in the bar. I think it went a little like this:

She drinks water, apple juice and soda pop
She jogs and jogs and never stops
She's always on the phone a lot
When she does it (ooh) she always has to stop.

We are the ********* girls

(missing a couple lines here) -- anyone remember them?
She never gets the best of them
She likes big, tall Christian men

We are the ********* girls

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Now playing: Nails - 88 Lines About 44 Women

Burnin' Down the House

1. Earlier last week Lucy came down with a fever. Her illness, while not serious, was timed so that Cary felt obligated to stay home from the Of Montreal concert the next night. It was really nice of him to offer to let me go, but since my mom was joining us too I think it was the most obvious decision.

2. I did enjoy the concert, though they failed to play a number of my favorite tracks including Lucy's favorite* and "Cato as a Pun."

3. Then on Saturday after attending both a soccer game and a birthday party Henry came down with the same illness. The only real symptom is a fever of at least 102 and red-rimmed eyes. Lucy was better in 24 hours, but when Henry woke up this morning he still had his fever. So he is home from school for what I hope will only be one day. At the moment they are both cheering in front of a new episode of Go Diego Go, and I am feeling optimistic.

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*For Lucy --Now playing: Of Montreal - The Past is a Grotesque Animal
(aka "The Story Song")

Front page procrastination

I was just going to check out my suspicion that the Scotland Yard Gospel Choir sounds a bit like the Housemartins when I found this on the NYT homepage. It was so enjoyable that I had to post it immediately, and I think everyone (but DQ in particular) should read it.
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Now playing: The Scotland Yard Gospel Choir - This World Has No Place For Me

Off to a bad start, again.

1. I was exhausted from staying up too late and watching the Bills lose.

2. Then I was trying to empty the coffee from the grinder into the filter this morning. The filter tipped over spilling ground coffee all over the counter, the shelves of the lazy susan below, the freshly mopped floor, and my outfit.

3. Then I realized I had to make up a grocery list right then, because I couldn't go to the store tomorrow, like I had planned. (I forgot I have P.T.).

So to cheer myself up I bought another water bottle -- this one's for me.

P.S. The new Jens Lekman came out today and it's fantastic.
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Now playing: Jens Lekman - Kanske Ar Jag Kar I Dig

Not a fan of the three day weekend

I remember what three day weekends used to mean: Sunday night was another night to go out. If I decided to work on Monday I got time and half and an extra paid day off.

Now three day weekends just create an additional day when I attempt to entertain my kids without my husband around, there is no US Mail delivery, and Nickelodeon may preempt its normal programming for a Teennick marathon.

Plus I had a migraine today, so I had to skip the gym. And it was about 85 freaking degrees, again.

On the bright side, Henry had a friend over this morning, and he finally found someone besides his sister who is willing to jump around like crazy in his bedroom listening to Devo.

On the brighter side: another Trouser Press entry for Peter Bjorn and John.

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Now playing: Devo - Jocko Homo

Sunday Drive Gone Wrong

1. Cary suggested we go pick up some apple cider at the Water Mill today. He was sure that he had read in the Amherst Bee that it was open. When we arrived it was closed. We picked up a spare copy of the Bee and confirmed that the hours were yesterday during the Farmer's Market.

2. We decided to stop by Clayton's toys to kill a little time and then drive to Ziggy's for lunch. No less than five minutes after we arrived Lucy peed all over herself.

3. So I gingerly escorted the poor child to the car, and we drove straight home where she refused a bath, so I was forced to give her a shower and attempt not to get too wet myself.

I've got a new review up on Venuszine, finally.

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Now playing: PJ Harvey - White Chalk

Let me see your big kid underwear

1. My day began with Lucy demanding to see my underwear, so she could make sure that hers matched mine. This is common practice in our house, and when we are unable to coordinate tears ensue. Today was one of those days.

2. Then I dropped her off at pre-school and rushed home to try and crank out a Venus review for which I have no promo copy.

3. When I picked up Lucy we dashed off to Macy's so I could buy some make-up from Clinique, something I rarely do, because they were having one of their give-aways. I got home and found they sold me the wrong stuff, so now I have to return it. I just ordered the stuff I wanted on eBay anyway and figured screw the free stuff, I never use it. Lucy cried the entire time we were in Macy's because she knows a little girl named Macy and she could not understand why we were not at Macy's house.

4. I tried to lure Lucy home by telling her I had a surprise for her. When I showed her the copy of Cookie's Week that I ordered from her book club at school she burst into tears and said, "I wanted toys."

5. In spite of being so tired she could barely eat her lunch she still refused to nap. As soon as I struggled to get her into bed she sat up and screamed for me to release her to downstairs saying her room was "too hot" and she "missed her Henry."

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Now playing: PJ Harvey - The Devil

Distasteful Craigslist Experience

Anyone else have have a really bad time with something on Craigslist?

Here's what just happened to me:

Friday I saw a dining room set in Rochester that I loved. But it had a hutch that Cary said we didn't need, and when he checked in with the guy to see if he would split the set up the guy said no.
Then last night the set was back up, the guy was Mr. Flexible because he didn't realize that the table top was veneer until a buyer told him so. He agreed over the phone to sell us the set, (we were going to take the hutch and donate it -- that was Cary's idea) but since it was 80 miles away we couldn't get it until Saturday. He offered to take less money. So Cary offered him $50 less.

He just wrote me to tell me that he got a full price offer from the first people so he decided to sell it to them and we were out of luck. He noted that we might have changed our minds on Saturday, so oh well.

But here's the thing -- I really wanted this stupid furniture. I felt so good last night, like something was going right, and now, well, I'm left feeling empty, with nothing but some good blog post material.

Now I am left with my same crappy table with the ripped chair, and no idea when I will be able to replace it, plus I am more wary than ever of finding something through Craigslist which is the only way we can really justify the expense.

Update: I am not alone, by all means check out the link LHM left in the comment area.

Why I Love Garden Design Magazine

My new issue of Garden Design magazine just arrived with an article detailing how to rip out your lawn, and replace it with non-grass alternatives.

There are a variety of reasons that we will probably never free ourselves from the cycle of mowing, weeding, and fertilizing as much as I would love to, but reading the article reminded me that my distaste for my neighbor's pursuit of the perfect lawn is not completely misplaced.

Much like the last issue that was full of exotic Salvias, there is always something I'm compelled to read about, or dream about. They ran an article on Natural Swimming Pools, the only kind I would ever consider and hence we will never have a pool.

Here are some photos from my garden that I never got around to posting:

From left to right: Kniphofia, Canna, Crocosmia Lucifer

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Now playing: PJ Harvey - Grow Grow Grow

Picture Day

1. It was Henry's wish to have his school picture taken in a white button-down shirt and tie. When he mentioned this to me his wardrobe contained neither. But since I found the request so funny, and think it has such potential to embarrass him in the future, I purchased a tie from Lands End and a shirt from Old Navy.

2. I was rethinking my plan this morning when we tried to get him into his get up. He didn't want to tuck the shirt in. The shirt collar was not made for a tie. He ate breakfast in his bathrobe to keep his clothes clean and ended up covered in fleecy lint.

3. He returned from school with the tie balled up inside his backpack, shirt untucked, but he assured me that his pictures turned out "awesome."

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Now playing: The Hollies - Bus Stop

Proof that I am only a recovering Type A personality

Two days ago we got a note home from Henry's teacher requesting that all children drink water instead of juice during snack time. Witness my shame spiral:

1. The easiest thing to do would be to purchase small sized bottled water and send it instead of juice. But of course I could not do this.

2. Why not? Because he will take like two sips and waste the rest. Plus I know the bottles won't get recycled at school. I am well aware that the juice boxes weren't getting recycled either but they can't be recycled. The thought of sending in a bottle full of water that would go in the trash made me crazy.

3. I assembled all of the water bottles in our house that could be sent into school with Henry, filled them and proceeded to test them for leaks. None of them passed to my satisfaction. I don't want water getting all over his homework. I can't send the bottle in empty because expecting him to fill it at school would be messier than a juicebox.

4. Yesterday I sent Henry into school with a note saying, "Please let Henry drink from the drinking fountain because he doesn't drink much water. Please let me know if he is too disruptive." You can only imagine what giving Henry carte blanche for the water fountain could mean for the classroom.

5. Last night the teacher called me and said that I could send in flavored water, as long as it isn't sticky. While I know he likes Fruit20 because my mom buys it, I don't want him having Nutrasweet everyday either. Plus the bottles are 11 oz -- way too much for him to drink. (I checked today at the store).

6. So I purchased a new water bottle, the fourth I've bought, that doesn't have a pop-up spout on it, that way Henry can drink from it without making love to the spout (anyone with small children will know what I mean here). This sucker seals completely. It was freaking $13.99, which if it means I don't have to buy juice or water, is still cheap, but my god, that's a lot for a water bottle. I got the blue one in the picture.

Anyone still reading? I think I need to go have a lie down.

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Now playing: Peter Bjorn And John - Firing Blanks (Bonus Track)

New Slang

Last night Henry was ready for soccer practice early and wanted to wait for Cary in the van. When I suggested he might be too hot in the car he said, "No worries Mom. This bad boy is always ready to go."

I don't think he was being sarcastic either.

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Now playing: Peter Bjorn and John - Young Folks (beyond the wizard's sleeve re-animation)

Who knew violin could actually be enjoyable?

Last night Cary, my mom, and I headed to the venue formerly known as The Church, now, (somewhat comically to me) known as Babeville, to see Andrew Bird. Wow.

He played solo, creating the rhythm section himself by looping violin lines and whistling, then adding guitar and vocals to riff on the album version of his songs. He ran the sounds through two old Victrola-type speakers, one of which spun very fast on command. The effect made it sound like we were in a room full of stringed-instruments. After the second song, when Andrew was saying a brief hello and remarking on the unbelievable acoustics in, er Babeville, a guy yelled out, "This is already the best show I've ever been to." It will be tough to prove him wrong.

PS The picture was taken by a roving photographer at the show. The curious among you can find another of mom and me here.

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Now playing: Andrew Bird - Fake Palindromes

Cure for the Common Cold

Yesterday I pulled myself out of bed to go see Metric. The band played probably 70% new material, all of which was great. Although the show was at the Town Ballroom, and my mom and I got there too late to get one of the six seats in the place, we had a great view of the stage.

I could see the enthusiastic twentysomething negotiating with the security guy to give her a set list. I spotted two other people who pulled the same trick as me, and bought a dress from the H&M girl's department.

Crystal Castles opened. Whatever hipness they may possess was lost on me. Alice, the near anorexic, did nothing but dance and shine blinking lights on the audience. And the other dude's best trick was running his laptop in the near darkness.

But back to Metric. Emily has the market cornered on postpunk t-shirt dressing. She was sporting a Stranglers t-shirt, with shorts and boots when we saw her on Letterman. Last night she was in a Joy Division t-shirt (Unknown Pleasures, but with multi-colored Mountains!) that fit her like a dress. Emily, who is your tailor?

They said they don't even know when the new record is coming out. What a tease!

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Now playing: Metric - Parkdale

Best thing yet I've seen on IvyGate

Here's a tidbit: "For the past week, tons of freshman have been aimlessly wandering Sterling library in search of a secret room where supposedly professors would go to hide from their students..." Click on the link for the whole delightful story.
http://www.ivygateblog.com/blog/2007/09/oh_yale.html

Gotta get me a gun

A glue gun that is! (For the Tootsie Roll Pop Spiders I have been assigned to make for the Halloween Party) You may all laugh now.

Despite negative educational experiences by pals LHM, Mommy at Work, and Anne, I've been doused with some abededarian holy water.

I think I lucked out in the room parent department. My co-room parent is a former elementary school teacher whose home is stocked with supplies from her old classroom, and she showed up with a binder full of ideas. She was as easy-going as a woman toting a binder full of ideas could have been.

Henry's current classroom teacher is as enthusiastic as last year's teacher was curt and dismissive. She has sent home extra books on music and science to give Henry additional stimulation, one of which she seems to have purchased solely on his account.

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Now playing: Jens Lekman - A Postcard To Nina

When did I stop feeling like Lisa and start feeling more like Marge?

I've been trying to Simpsonize myself for weeks ever since I saw Takka Takka's results on Brooklyn Vegan. What a hassle. But after JSE's results I decided to give it another go.

What I really wanted to do was make this my picture for my blog since when I leave comments the old picture makes it appear as if I have no eyes or teeth. Kind of amusing, but kind of not. Do any tech savvy folks know how I could make this happen? Blogger refused to recognize the .jpg and so did my computer.

As an aside, while I was working on this, Lucy drew all over the back of Henry's neck with a green marker.

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Now playing: Peter Bjorn and John - Sitar Folks

That's Educational!

1. Lucy loves pre-school. So far I love everything about it too, except the parking situation. I think I may need to re-learn how to parallel park before the year is out. This concerns me greatly.

2. While I am still afraid of the PTA, I agreed to be the one of two room parents for Henry's class today. They were short one volunteer and asked me because I was the only person to check the box that said, "I don't have enough time to be a room parent but I still want to volunteer in the classroom." Lesson learned. But I should not be short of blog material for the rest of the school year. I wish I had LHM's inherent craftiness because I think I will be planning parties for first graders. I am gratefully soliciting suggestions for the Halloween party should the mood strike anyone.

3. Because of a four-day long migraine (which may be over, finally) and some goings on with a friend I feel overwhelmed and behind schedule on everything in my life.

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Now playing: Shout Out Louds - South America

Rockin' at the Knox post-mortem

1. Overall - an amazing event. They had a few sound problems, particularly during Paolo Nutini, but the planning committee did an unbelievable job -- even the food was decent.

2. The highlight of the night was crowd-related, and happened during Nutini's (zzzz) set. My mom and I were right behind a group of young women in their late teens who, in spite of doing their best impression to look slightly edgy, were still clearly fresh-faced and adorable. When Nutini launched into a cover of Vera Hall's "Trouble so Hard" (a.k.a. Moby's "Natural Blues") three of the girls exchanged ecstatic looks, stood up, and broke out into a fully choreographed dance routine. Best thing ever.



3. The rain sucked. Mom and I got soaked. The wind blew Feist's hat away and the weather almost cut her set short. I would have been really sad if she left the stage without playing "Mushaboom," but fortunately the rain let up and I was not disappointed. (We spent some time with a few happy-go-lucky strangers under a very leaky tarp in between Feist and Elvis. At least two references to March of the Penguins were made.)

4. I can't forget about the local openers. It was the first time I'd seen Mark Norris in about 18 years, (since before Girlpope, I think) and he and the Backpeddlers sounded great. I wish I had been close enough to catch a CD. The between set banter was very charming. The Great Train Robbery brought back girlhood memories of traipsing around to see the only local band my friends actually liked.

5. And then there was Elvis. And his unbelievably awesome piano player, who also played a theremin! Elvis' voice sounded great. I couldn't believe how many people talked during the entire acoustic set. Christ on crack, they just sat through a monsoon, you'd think if they wanted to talk, they'd just go to a bar. He sing-talked his way through "God's comic." Very entertaining. And nearly 5000 people sang the chorus to "Allison."

6. And at the end of the night I got Henry another free poster for his growing collection.

You know it's time to take a break from the iPod when

you see JOYDIVR on a vanity license plate, as I did this morning, and immediately think, "I guess someone's a big Joy Division fan."

But in the time it took me to pull up closer to peer in at the driver I realized the owner was probably a diver, not a fan of Ian Curtis, Bernard Sumner, Peter Hook, and Stephen Morris.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

1. Henry began first grade today. Unlike his first day of Kindergarten, things went remarkably well. He popped off the bus and said, "I had a great day, Mom. And tomorrow will be another great day of school." This year's teacher seems remarkably well-tempered and eager.

2. I did some housework with only one child nipping at my heels. Hardly bliss, but not torture either.

3. My second Trouser Press entry, on Rilo Kiley, is available. You can read it here.

My pal Mr. Parnell has a knack for creating up lists of dream covers, while I only know one when I hear it:

(For Henry) Peter Bjorn and John - "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard"

I always knew they were better than me.

A classic day with Henry

1. We had to stop by Henry's school to drop off his supplies. He spotted a kid from last year's class and said loudly, "There's Willy, the bad kid." I'm positive Willy's mom heard us. When I asked him in the car what Willy had done that was so bad Henry said, "He said lots of bad words for no reason. And got sent to the Principal's office more times than me!"

2. I had to take Henry to the Pediatrician at the last minute because he got a splinter in his foot on Saturday night and didn't bother to tell me until today. I tried taking it out myself, but it wasn't protruding, so I couldn't get a handle on it.

a. When we arrived at the Doctor's office I was told that we were not allowed to wait in the Well Child waiting area because they were busy with last minute exams before school. So even though Henry was not sick, we had to wait in the Sick Visit waiting area. When I questioned the receptionist about the logic of this she said, "It's really no different than going to a store and being exposed to sick people." (While Henry is practically licking the rocking horse.) Huh? Maybe if the store sells only quinine and snake venom. Then it turned out that someone had spit up on one of the vinyl bench seats. Another Father kindly alerted the receptionist, and covered the offending pool with a tissue, but it stank. When we left half an hour later, after Henry's splinter was removed in nanoseconds, the vomit was still there! If we get the stomach flu I am going to be so pissed.

b. When we were driving home I said to Henry, "Aren't you glad we went to the Doctor? She took your splinter out in no time at all." He replied, "Yeah. Doctors really are better than you, Mom."

Beyond beleaf

After dinner tonight Cary and I discovered to our surprise that Lucy had shoved a piece of maple leaf into Henry's ear. Rather than tell us what had happened Henry decided to try and remove it with a q-tip, driving it even deeper into his ear canal. Cary was eventually able to remove it with tweezers, sparing us all a trip to the ER.

My kids never spare me the details, "Mommy, Henry's bothering me. I want a turn. Lucy took my flashlight." But when it comes to something where he actually should tell on his sister, he tries to handle it himself.