Crosseyed and Painless

Last Friday night I was supposed to go see Sleigh Bells with my mom. I had the sitter. I had tickets waiting for us at the Will Call. But I'd had a migraine for three of the past four straight days, so I decided to skip the show.

I had a vision of my name on the list. The last name on the list that hadn't been crossed out. This isn't the first time I'd done this and our concert scene is tiny, so I thought, "what if people start recognizing my name as the person who never picks up her tickets."

It was pretty easy to dismiss that thought, but it reminded me of another list that my name is still on. The list for people who don't know what they want to be when they grow up. An Ivy League education is like buying an advance ticket on the rest of your life and I'm pretty sure I'm the only person in my graduating class still waiting to pick up my ticket. Just as I really wanted to see Sleigh Bells, but I didn't want to stand for several hours, sit through a lousy opening band (or two), and leave the house around the time I normally go to bed, I am deeply ambivalent about the work world. The longer I stay out the harder it will be to go back, yet unless something wonderful landed in my lap, I don't think I want to go back right now. I realize that's not a very good attitude to have.

I've recently discussed looking for work with a few of the people closest to me. The discussion alone was enough to throw me into a complete tizzy. And it didn't make things any clearer to me about what I should do next.

I think David Byrne said it best on "Crosseyed and Painless":

I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting
The feeling returns whenever we close out eyes
Lifting my head, looking around inside
The island of doubt, it's like the taste of medicine
Working by hindsight, got the message from the oxygen
I'm making a list, find the cost of opportunity
Doing it right (Right), right, facts are useless in emergencies
The feeling returns, whenever we close our eyes
Lifting my head, looking around inside
Facts are simple and facts are straight
Facts are lazy and facts are late
Facts all come with points of view
Facts don't do what I want them to
Facts just twist the truth around
Facts are living turned inside out
Facts are getting the best of them
I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting
I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting
I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting
I'm still waiting, I'm still waiting, (Thank you) I'm still waiting, (We like to thank our crew) I'm still waiting

I always knew my mom was the coolest

but now everyone knows just how great her taste in music is.

I have a piece in PopMatters today about how much my mom loves her iPod. I write about how she and my friend Jeff actually buy a lot more music now because they can download MP3s and use the Internet to learn about new bands more easily than in the past.

The negative comments crack me up. It's worth checking out the piece just to see how riled up people can get. At least someone cared enough to complain.

What the oughts hath wrought

My ten favorite albums of the decade:

1. Arcade Fire - Funeral
This record got me to listen to music again, and I'm still grateful.

2. Of Montreal - Hissing Fauna Are You the Destroyer?
The best record about mental illness ever made.

3. LCD Soundsystem - Self-titled
James Murphy is more of a singles artist but "Losing My Edge" was my song of the decade. Definitely lost my edge.

4. M.I.A. - Arular

5. White Stripes - Elephant
Before Henry could speak he could hum the beginning of "Seven Nation Army."

6. The Thermals - The Body, The Blood, The Machine

7. Metric - Grow Up and Blow Away

8. Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins - Rabbit Fur Coat
Wasn't really a fan of Jenny Lewis until I saw her live. Even though there are songs I have to skip on this record, it also includes a few of the best songs she ever wrote.

9. Thao With the Get Down Stay Down - We Brave Bee Stings and All

10. St. Vincent - Marry Me

And now for something completely different...
Ten favorites from 2009
1. St. Vincent - Actor
2. Metric - Fantasies
3. Thao with the Get Down Stay Down - Know Better Learn Faster
(These three acts happen to coincide with the three interviews I did in the last 12 months. I am a lucky girl).
4. Florence and the Machine - Lungs
5. Emily Wells - Dirty (EP)
6. Taken By Trees, East of Eden
7. Happy Hollows, Spells
8. Future of the Left, Travels With Myself and Another
9. YACHT, See the Mystery Lights
10. Jay Reatard, Watch Me Fall

2009 was one of the best years for musical releases that I can remember.

No body, no blood, no machine

I'm supposed to be at the Thermals show right now. Instead I just finished cleaning up a vomit-splattered sink. Henry's allergies are so bad that he is running a fever and puking from the post nasal drip. Or he's just sick.

Even though I thought Now We Can See was kind of a snooze, I'm still a huge fan of The Body, The Blood, The Machine. Plus they were the first entry I wrote for Trouser Press. I figured they'd be pretty great live, but not only could I not leave Henry here with a sitter, I can't imagine I'd enjoy a show if I knew my little boy was miserable at home without me.

Here's a video from my favorite song by the Thermals, "Returning to the Fold:"
How cute is Hutch in his little rugby? Too cute!

Cautiously optimistic

So we're on spring break. So far we don't have any big plans, but I will say that the first two days have not been completely dominated by the children's misbehavior and hijinx. We were desperately ready for Cary to come home by dinner today, but there were moments yesterday where Henry and Lucy played together with an uneasy peace. Henry organized an impromptu limbo contest, during which Lucy fell to her knees in the mud. But nobody called me! I continued to prepare the flower beds for new growth -- without interruption.

And I've got another Donnybrook review -- Winter Gloves about a girl.

I'm also completely obsessed with Emily Wells. Check it. And Lucy thinks you should check out Fantasies, the new Metric album featuring "her Emily." It's available as a digital download right now.

There are so many Emilys now, I'm not sure what to do!

I can't see the future but I know it's got big plans for me.

Got to interview another musician yesterday -- very exciting! But it looks like the write up will have to wait.

I'm listening to the sounds of Lucy and a friend throwing a succession of birthday parties for Lucy's stuffed animals. There is much negotiation of what age each animal will turn ("9" "No, how about 10.") and exclamations that the pretend gifts are "just what I always wanted." Plus the stuffed animals keep needing to go potty.

Now they are off to play the honeybee hop.

I have a million things that I should be doing, but I can't really reconcile the check book while keeping half an eye on the children.

My latest Donnybrook review: The 1990s

Actually, that joke is still pretty funny

Cary and I went to see Morrissey last night.

Ultimately I think it will go down as one of those shows I remember more for what happened around the performance than for the performance itself.

Jen14221 was complaining she had to attend, then announcing via Twitter that it was fabulous. My pregnant pal Kate was walking briskly up the stairs to pee and call the sitter throughout the night. And I musn't forget the precious superfan couple who sat in front of us -- too young to remember the Smiths, but they still knew all the lyrics to "How Soon is Now." But apparently the night would have been incomplete without the Morrissey gropers. The first guy who tried to hug him on stage seemed sincere, but after that all these people were looking at the crowd with an expression that said, "I too am hugging Morrissey" as security gingerly hauled them off stage.

Try as I might, I can't begin to forget Morrissey's slightly disturbing heart-shaped back sweat, or the way he threw not one, but two shirts into the audience. His voice has lost nothing, yet at nearly 50 he is more Tom Jones than Mick Jones.

But I digress, because it's really all about Morrissey and me. I first heard the Smiths as a high school freshman -- "Please, please let me get what I want" from the Pretty in Pink soundtrack, to be exact. I had yet to learn that compilations often host a band's throwaway tracks, but whatever, I was enthralled. The following Christmas I got The Queen is Dead on LP. At that moment, no piece of music meant more to me. Then the Smiths broke up my junior year of high school and I was bereft.

So there was a lot riding on last night's performance. And while I wasn't at all disappointed, alot has changed since 1987.

Morrissey would be nothing without his backing band. Even if he sculpts their artistic decisions, he feeds on their vitality -- you could practically see a pulse beating through the veins beneath their matching Tour of Refusal t-shirts. Morrissey may have once defined youthful malaise, but now it is his band that keeps him from sounding stale.

I tried to imagine what it would be like if I'd seen Morrissey, Marr, and Andy Rourke and Mike Joyce. I don't think it would have been as good.

For me the best part of last night was not that I finally saw one of my icons perform live, but that I realize that Morrissey is better off post-Smiths, and so am I.

Update: a picture of the heart-shaped back sweat! Thanks, Jen14221 and WhippetGood

Newsy!

We've been busy around here for once. (I wrote about some of this stuff on facebook, but until LHM sees fit to join I must repeat myself here too.)

1. Cary wrote a book! It's called Don't Swear with Your Mouth Full! I'm really biased but I think it's great and could really help parents with difficult children. His approach has helped our family a lot.

2. I interviewed Emily Haines from Metric for VenusZine. The issue will be on sale until June, but it isn't on the web. I made her promise to play a show in Buffalo. I hope she doesn't let me down.

3. In more regularly scheduled news, I reviewed Mirah, Mazes, the Drones, Matt & Kim, and AC Newman at Donnybrook, and Faunts for Venus. I actually liked almost all of these records, except for Faunts, but Mazes was a particular favorite.

Lazy Link Dump

I haven't stopped writing reviews, but haven't mentioned it in awhile.

I say nice things about my friend Daryle in the VenusZine staff faves here.

I am less kind, but fair, to Animal Collective here and probably overly generous to Cars and Trains over here (both at Donnybrook). Almost forgot about Vic Chestnutt and Elf Power too, way over here, also at Donnybrook.

Because Nobody Asked, again -- Best of '08

I did a lot of record reviews this year. Some of my favorites were even records that I discovered through writing reviews, which is even sweeter.

Top 10 of '08

1. Thao and the Get Down Stay Down - We Brave Bee Stings and All
2. The Ting Tings - We Started Nothing
3. Vampire Weekend
4. Pas-Cal - I Was Raised on Matthew, Mark, Luke, and Laura

I will be listening to records 1-4 well into 2009, while 5-10 are less likely to endure.

5. Lykke Li - Youth Novels
6. White Denim - Exposion
7. Ladytron - Velocifero
8. Jenny Lewis - Acid Tongue
9. Islands - Arms Way
10. Her Space Holiday - XOXO, Panda and the New Kid Revival.

Next year I'm already excited about new records from Andrew Bird, Metric, and Annie. I haven't had much time to listen to the Santogold record, She and Him, or Deerhoof's Kill Maggie, so maybe those would have made the list if I didn't run out of time!

Now I wear the red dress, paint my toes and twirl

So Lucy and I are feeling (appropriately?) full of ourselves at the moment.

She just said to me, as she stepped out of the bath, "We're smart right. We're the smartest people in the world, right?" She was genuinely distressed when I told her that, no, we are not the smartest people in the world.

She had her Nutrcracker dress rehearsal tonight. She is an angel, one of many, and can't wait to don her feathered wings for the Friday night performance. After she was done rehearsing she was all sassy, wanting to run around and introduce herself to all the other little ballerinas and show off her twirling. She wanted none of my advice, my lap, or even the seat next to me. I practically had to carry her out of the theater.

Pretty much out of the blue I got a chance to interview a musician that I, well, I pretty much worship. I've only "interviewed" one other musician (unless you count my family) and that never saw the light of day. So this was a pretty big deal. But I was going to have to do the interview while at the dress rehearsal.

I immediately inventoried what might go wrong. In the last 24 hours I drew up questions, cleared them with the editor, asked anyone who would listen for moral support, listened to the band non-stop, procured Cary's microcassette recorder, watched the band's DVD (twice), and tested my cell phone on speakerphone picking up an answering machine (Hi, Mom).

So I left Lucy just as she was about to go on stage and set up a mobile office in the minivan.

The interview went way better than I could have hoped.

Believe you me I'll be posting if (no, when) it goes to press.

There've been some heaping doses of what went right lately. You know what that means -- trouble is right around the corner!

Home, will infect whatever you do

I went to see David Byrne with my mom last Friday night, and though I'm not exactly able to concentrate at the moment (two kids singing two different songs) this is the closest I will get to peace today, so I thought I'd better put down some thoughts about the show.

David Byrne's voice is still tremendous. He also has incredible stage presence -- he got a standing ovation just for coming out on stage.

He played Talking Heads songs. Never would I have expected to hear "Cross-eyed and painless" or "Life During Wartime" live. But he also played more well-known songs like "Burning Down the House," "Take Me to the River," and "Once in a lifetime." And never for a moment did the performance feel like a victory lap. Byrne was with us every step of the way.

I was too young to see the Talking Heads when they were together. But this show made up for anything I missed.

The new songs held their own. I particularly like "Home."

But it wasn't just a new song vs. old song kind of performance. It was a Performance. Everyone wore white. He had three back-up singers who danced and three back-up dancers who sang, and at one point danced and sang with electric guitars in their hands. The dancers almost stole the show. I don't think I've seen as joyful a performance outside of Lucy's pre-school.

I had the sensation while I was at the show that this was the sort of positive experience I'm always hoping for at shows, but rarely find. And I'd completely forgotten what a Talking Heads super fan I was -- I involuntarily knew the words to all the songs.

While I was there I kept thinking, "this can't get any better." And then it did. And it did. And it did.

Also, this is my 300th post. I can't of anything else I'd rather be writing about.

They call them long weekends for a reason

I'd just like to say, for the record, that long weekends piss me off. My kids don't have school again until next Tuesday, and I have no earthly idea what I am going to do with them from now until our routine resumes.

I would welcome the time with my kids if they were just nicer to each other. Every time Henry plays the piano Lucy screams. I can't believe I'm actually telling my kid to stop practicing piano. I feel more like a referee than a mom.

On the bright side, I've got a bunch of stuff up on the web. I declare my love for Sigg bottles at Venus. Also at Venus I express disappointment in the latest Stills record. At Donnybrook I cover These United States and Her Space Holiday, both of which are excellent.

Two parties and two more reviews

I think this may be a WWW first, Cary and I are going to paint the town red. First we are headed out to an engagement party at the Frank Lloyd Wright boathouse followed by a second party -- what has been described to me as a "Disco Boat Cruise." I hope we have a great time and I'm sure nothing will go wrong...

Also, I reviewed the wacky new CD by Daedelus, Love to make music to and Pas/Cal's wonderful I was raised on Matthew, Mark, Luke & Laura, both for Donnybrook.

Sweet, sweet laughter

For me, one of '08's most anticipated releases, Head Like a Kite's There is Loud Laughter Everywhere has arrived. It met my expectations and then some, and I reviewed it for Donnybrook. Sweet laughter indeed.

But you don't have to believe me, you can listen to a live performance by the band streaming through your computer, or fancy phone, or whatever, this Thursday, June 26 at noon on KEXP.

I've got a soft spot for HLAK because it's lovely front man, Dave Einmo, is currently the only musician I have ever interviewed. And even though our chat never saw publication it was still a great experience for me, even though Dave was getting snowed on while I struggled awkwardly with the micro cassette recorder.

I wish she didn't need the squirts.

Despite my hopes to the contrary, Lucy has asthma. We now have our own nebulizer. I let her put the medicine in it herself. She says, "I want to do the squirts! I looooove the squirts." At least she has gotten used to using the machine because the treatments are still onerous even is she isn't screaming.

But, I've got some writing to share. I reviewed the new Twilight Sad mini LP, Here it Never Snowed, Afterwards it Did, for Donnybrook over here. Also here, at Venus I review March Forth by KaiserCartel.

Perfect Day

Yesterday was just about perfect. I slept in (7:50 a.m., y'all) after rolling in from a night out with the girls at around 2 a.m. I turned in a review then we went to a friend's for lunch, followed by a fund raiser for the Chinese earthquake. Then I went to the Cranial Sacral therapist (i.e. I got a massage). Then we had dinner with my in-laws. I had a feeling of general well-being pretty much foreign to me. I am sure it won't last...

Plus I've got some writing to share. I reviewed James Pants' debut for Donnybrook. Plus I gave Moo.com a thumb's up for Venus and they just put up my review for New Bloods from issue #35 on their website too.

Free Kitten and Islands reviews

This week I reviewed the new record by Islands, which I highly recommend, for Venus. I also reviewed, and did not particularly enjoy, the new Free Kitten for Donnybrook.

More reviews

I've got a review of Kassin+2 up at Donnybrook -- here. Plus a review of Nik Freitas at Venus here.

I hope I can stay this busy and balance the writing with Lucy's demands to ride her bike to the bus stop to greet Henry. She demands to do this at all hours of the day, even when the bus isn't coming any time soon. For his part Henry hasn't been demanding that much but all that will change once he completes all the pages in his Transformers Magic Ink Activity book.

Things are going well; I am very afraid.

1. Cary and I met with Henry's principal about getting him an appropriate teacher for next year. She said absolutely everything that I wanted to hear. I am cautiously optimistic.

2. I've got two new reviews for perusal. Birds of Avalon -- Outer Upper Inner at Venus and Shy Child -- Noise Won't Stop at Donnybrook.