1. I spent the day prepping for our trip to Toronto, and I now suspect that the remnants of Ernesto may be following us to the Great White North. Sadly we have planned nothing we can do inside except spend time in the hotel. However, my fellow bloggers currently visiting the Outer Banks are having their vacations disturbed more severely, so I don't want to complain too much.
2. Henry refused to let me leave him in Gym care today. But I did because I am a cruel and insensitive beast of a mother. Upon my return I learned not only that he didn't listen, but that he, "spilled his juice, and stuck his feet in it." That's my boy!
3. He decided once again to treat a headache with a soaking wet wash cloth. He also treated my kitchen table, my Heywood Wakefield coffee table, and then he locked the washcloth up in a cardboard photo box and practically tackled me when I tried to free it. (All of this happened when I was on the phone with my mom, who is suffering from mysterious bouts of nausea and chills).
   

On a happier note: my "good" watch returned from Houston today with all of its digits tightly attached to its faceplate. It has no plans to land in the toilet. And, as I write, Cary is bathing both kids. I can hear them bugging him for a change. Can you say shaudenfraude?

I knew there were going to be days like this...

When I started this blog it crossed my mind that maybe not enough things would actually "go wrong" to merit cataloging. I was so naive...

1. Minutes before we were due to leave for Henry's kindergarten orientation I came downstairs from dressing Lucy to find Henry standing in the middle of a water-splattered kitchen floor. He was holding a sopping wet wash cloth on his head. His clothes were soaked, and he said, "I had a headache." (But orientation actually went really well, so maybe school will go OK too. Only future posts will tell)
   
2. Henry needed to get a haircut today. As soon as we arrived at the salon he announced that he needed to use the bathroom. I went in with him because they have all kinds of froufy breakable objects in there and I could see him getting into trouble. Let's just say it took him awhile. Then he stood up and he wasn't going to use any toilet paper. It was hidden in some sort of decorative urn, but that is no excuse! So I start shouting, "Henry, Henry, what are you doing" as he slowly moved to pull up his underwear. I reached out to grab him by the waist and gently assist him back down onto the seat and as I did this my watch popped off and landed in the toilet bowl. Christ on Crack! I had to fish it out with a baggie, and put it in another baggie (stockpiled in my purse, thank you very much), but I know the watch will have to be trashed. I just haven't done the deed yet.
   
1. Yes I am using subheadings. Deal. Here are the facts about the watch. The watch was a Timex Easy Reader that I had had since High School. It was cheap, but I really liked it.
2. I had recently purchased some cute grosgrain ribbon watchbands on ebay to wear with the watch because the band, also from high school, had broken.
3. When changing to said ribbon bands, one of the metal arms the holds the bands went flying across the room requiring an emergency trip to Target where I was given the replacements for free.
4. My "good" watch is in Houston for the second time this summer having the numerals on its dial reattached which is why the Easy Reader came out of the jewelry box and met with its sad end.
   

Everyday is like Sunday

1. Lucy did not nap.
2. We tried to be good parents. We thought hey, let's get the kids some fresh air, and take them out for a walk. Each child had a big wheel. Henry is too proficient and kept trying take off. Lucy doesn't know how to pedal yet and needed to be pushed by me via the oversized handle at the back. The handle on her big wheel is intended for a person of about 4'9", so I was getting a backache the whole time. Plus it pulls to the right. I kept thinking, this is supposed to be fun. I see other people do it everyday, and they appear to be enjoying themselves. What is wrong with us?
   
3. After the walk we were playing in the yard. The kids spotted a butterfly and tried to chase it around the back of the house with great enthusiasm until Lucy stepped in a huge puddle, got mad, and then sat down in an even bigger puddle. So I brought her in for a late afternoon bath. Afterwards she kept repeating, "Butterfly, flowers, shoes." That part was cute.
   
4. For some unknown reason both kids screamed through dinner which earned them both unnusually early bedtimes. And now except for the burned Dutch oven I have to contend with, there is peace in the house.
   

Failure to disappear

1. The baby bunny is back. I admit, I knew it was trouble from the start, but because it was so little and cute I didn't react the way I do when I see its full-grown relatives around. I usually open the window and say, "hey, baby bunny, you don't live here." The thing is, maybe it does. I have been accepting my losses gracefully until today when I noticed that it had messed with one of my Clematis. Not the one I thought I killed, which has recovered quite well, but another one, pictured above. It had eaten its way across the base of the plant, essentially giving the above ground portion a death sentence. I took action. I had decided that plant needed a new home anyway because it wasn't getting enough sun, so I dug the entire thing up, and managed to move it, trellis and all, because bb didn't get every single vine. So before lunch time it had a new home in a sunnier spot not favored by bb. I may even see a bud or two before frost.
2. Henry was very disappointed today because he was trying to do a magic trick. He constructed a magic wand out of Magnetix then put a towel over a toy Mini Cooper. Then he tried a series of magic words including classics like Abracadabra, but also something like Ony mony pepperoni. Then he called out to me, "Mama, my magic trick is never going to work. I made a wand, put out this towel, and said abracadabra. But it never works. Auuughhh." I tried to explain about magic being sleight of hand and a trick of the eye (I was using the computer to comparison shop for Le Sportsac purses, but I was not out of earshot.) I said it was something people had to learn. He replied, "Oh, Mama, can I visit a magic shop?" And I said, "Let's talk about it when your daddy gets home." This is code for "maybe you will forget and I can move onto your next micro-interest.

1. Our day began with Henry's bloodiest nosebleed to date. It was the first time it occured to me that I might not able to stop it by myself, and had visions of visiting the ER. Unfortunately it happened at 12:17 a.m., so we sat on the bathroom floor with blood flying everywhere because Henry kept sneezing and shaking. 30 minutes later he was back in bed, none the worse for wear, though sadly he happened to be sleeping in his supercool Pixies T-shirt, made by Jen14221, and it pretty bloody.
   
2. We went over to my friend Allie's for the kids to play this morning. When it was time to go Henry literally had to be carried out, kicking and screaming, without his shoes. He just kept repeating, "I want to live here. I just love them."
3. Lucy did not nap.
4. Henry managed to finish out the day with another nosebleed. Then he and I went around the house with club soda, and Nature's Miracle and cleaned up all the blood from last night and today. He was really sweetly enthusiastic about the task. Then I took the kids for a wagon ride and played in the yard. It was almost a normal day.
   
5. He also invented a recipe, which definitely qualifies as something that went wrong: basmati rice with butter, cut up ham (cut up by his fingers), and pieces string cheese (the kind with alternating mozzerella and cheddar sections). He was so pleased with himself. He referred to it as a "grown-up curry." This is why I almost always make a separate meal for me and Cary, one for Henry, and one for Lucy.
   

Mosquitos are viscious

1. Cary was gone all day because after work he was invited to a dinner at Harry's Harbour Place Grille by the nice folks who manufacture the Ritalin patch. So it's another 12 hours of solo parenting for me. It is a bit less welcome than normal because Cary went golfing with his dad for the better part of the day last Sunday and I am still recovering.
   
2. Henry is back on Benadryl. He awoke this morning with clear allergy symptoms: Itchy, watery eyes and a drippy nose.
3. All new published reviews at AmpCamp are going into some kind of indierock internet wormhole. I think they are making some changes to the site, but I don't like that my reviews can no longer pop up on the start page as soon as they go live. You would actually have to look for them here. And seriously, who is going to do that? I actually read the site, but I like to start with the new reviews first.
4. Migraine number four this month hit today. Number three in the last five days. Not good.
   
5. Oh yeah. Mosquitos are viscious.
   

My pal Jen14221 gave my blog a published shout out - probably its first and last. You can read about it here.

Mommy, I scared!

1. Lucy woke up shortly after falling asleep tonight, and she just kept repeating, "I scared. I scared, Mommy. It dark." Fortunately she didn't seem all that scared, and she was able to be soothed with a diaper change, and a reading of Goodnight Gorilla. Even though she was far from terrified it was still kind of heart breaking to hear her express fear like that.
2. Speaking of heartbreaking (or heartbreakingly funny), Lucy has started barking like a dog, and panting all the time. But she still carries her two stuffed kitties around everywhere like they are here babies, so I don't know what is up with that.

As an aside, the latest migraine remedy, which is only sort of working, seems to be making me very spacey, and it makes it really hard to recall all the stuff that went wrong everyday. I know I spilled most of a box of cereal all over the floor the other day, but by the end of the day I didn't have any other details to go with it. I have been in touch with the neurologists office, and have been assured that this is just normal adjustment and if it doesn't go away soon I should call them back. Until them my posting may be a little more sporadic than normal, but you all can just pretend I am at a cybercafe in my true home of Amsterdam.

Well I knew it wasn't Buffalo!

You Belong in Amsterdam

A little old fashioned, a little modern - you're the best of both worlds. And so is Amsterdam. Whether you want to be a squatter graffiti artist or a great novelist, Amsterdam has all that you want in Europe (in one small city).

What European City Do You Belong In?

1. Lucy did not nap.
2. I took my children to the playground since it was going to be a long afternoon. Plus everytime we pass a playground it seems they would like to stop and play, but this time when we arrived neither wanted to do very much.
3. Henry did a little playing, kind of just to show me that, "hey mom, look, I can play here."
4. Lucy just kicked at the dirt under the swings, threw woodchips at Henry, refused to climb on anything, swing on anything, or slide down anything.
5. When I finally convinced them that maybe it was time to go and we were walking towards the car Henry took off running. I called his name and asked him to stop. He kept going.
6. He reached the edge of the parking lot. Stopped. Looked both ways.
7. Then the little pain in the butt ran right across the parking lot and up to the van.
8. I know I should be grateful that he stopped and looked both ways, like maybe I have managed to teach him something, but I was so furious. I also know that I should have probably picked up Lucy and ran with her after him, but I kept thinking, "of course he will stop, he's not insane is he?" Plus we were right next to the town pool and I was calling his name, and he didn't hear me but I know a million other people did, and of course if he had gotten hurt my embarrassment would have meant nothing but it didn enter into my head.
9. He just does whatever he wants and all I can do is my best to prepare him to look both ways before he runs out into the road.
   

Countdown to craziness... Henry style

Five kids at play time,
Four stints in time out,
Three bloody noses,
Two broken books, (one was from the library)
One home invasion,

And a Henry who is finally asleep.

What Goes Around Comes Around

1. We began our day with a fitting omen: Sufi puked up her entire breakfast moments after eating it. (Lucy cried out, "Oh dear! Mess!) Then Sufi proceeded to eat the puke before I could stop her. I figured it couldn't be that bad for her it had barely been in her stomach.
2. I was totally excited today because my mother-in-law was going to keep both kids for me so I could run errands and go to the gym. I thought I would have tons of time and not be rushed. I was totally wrong. I ended up picking them up with all of my groceries still in the car only to arrive to the news that they had not been their usual angelic selves for her while there, plus she had taken a long and frustrating phone call while they were over, which I know from experience is not easy. Then I had to take two hungry, cranky kids home and put away a week's worth of groceries with them underfoot asking for popsicles, juice, and cookies, pretty much anything but lunch.
   
3. Lucy woke up from her nap crying, but it wasn't clear why. Later, when we were trying to eat dinner, she kept saying "diaper, diaper" and crying more. It became apparent that she meant business. Yes, I mean that kind of business. She was asking for a new diaper first. So I changed her and she proceeded to use the diaper. When I asked her if she wanted a bath, she said "diaper, diaper" again. We went through the "process" a total of three times! After she was happy, and singing, and giving me hugs. It was like she was a different kid.
   
4. Just as I was settling in for a peaceful 45 minutes of TV watching, I was forced to close all the windows because the local teenage militia was once again firing some kind of rifle from the back deck next door, and this time it was actually loud enough to be really annoying. But, I guess I would prefer the evening hours to the time when I want to be outside with the kids. I think Henry still thinks that guns are what his dad told him they are: cookie makers!
   

Just to soften the blow of the last post a bit

A few things did go right during the chaos that was my so-called vacation.

1. My pal Allie and I went to see Husky Rescue at Mohawk Place. I drove us on a highway to get there. Thus accomplishing two major goals (see a concert/drive in traffic) in one fell swoop. Plus the show was awesome, the bar had good beer on tap, and most importantly for the over 35 crowd -- it had seats!
2. The stress of this week has produced not one headache.
3. We learned the name of Henry's Kindergarten teacher today and from what we have been able to learn from friends and neighbors she sounds like a good match for the boy.
   
4. My clematis is not dead.
   

Playing Catchup

1. Number of my reviews submitted to ampcamp in the last 14 days: 2. Number of my reviews that ampcamp has put online: 0.
2. On Saturday I spilled a brand new tin of mango altoids all over the floor.
3. The next day I was carrying six cans of pop and three bottles of Propel while talking to my mom on the phone. I dropped one of the cans. It exploded and I had to mop the kitchen floor.
   
4. A baby bunny ate significant portions of two hostas, one toad lily, and several cone flowers that I had been nurturing. Why are there baby bunnies now?
5. But here is the biggie. Cary has been off work this entire week. We were planning to leave for Toronto for three days on Tuesday, but Monday morning our car started behaving strangely. It shook when the speed reached fifty but was normal again once it hit 55. I called the dealer and they suggested I have the tires rotated. So at 6 PM the night before we are due to leave I do that instead of cooking dinner. Then Cary and my dad spend the rest of the evening deciding that it isn't the tires and that the problem is still there. Research on the web suggested many cars made during 2002 (our year) had serious and expensive transmission problems. At 9:40 that night Cary and I decide to postpone our trip even though I have been running around like a crazy person getting everything ready, and had just finished the preparations about 10 minutes beforehand. We drop the car off the next day (Wednesday) and are fortunate enough to borrow a car from my mom. We take Henry and Lucy to the beach. We get the car back on Thursday at noon, and the repair was under warranty (for something that was recalled and was supposedly already fixed a year ago). We tried to salvage the week as best we could be doing fun things with the kids but there is no doubt that it put a real damper on the week. I have to admit I didn't even really feel like posting.
6. Oh, and I am now on a very low dose of an antiseizure drug for my headaches.
   
7. And Cary might need braces again.

Happy Vacation!

1. Henry informed me today that he "cleaned the sink. Now it is sparkling clean." Really what he did was coat it with a layer of handsoap and run a little water on it. I still haven't gotten all of the soap off, but I did have a hard time explaining why rubbing soap on a sink wouldn't make it clean.
2. Just before we had to leave the house Henry decided that he wanted some applesauce. He insisted on opening it himself. I was distracted putting back all of the food he had removed from the pantry in order to get to the apple sauce. When I looked up he had sprayed about 1/3 of the container onto his shirt.
3. He also requested a bowl of cereal. When we didn't have anything that appealed to him he said, "Mommy, there is a new kind of cheerios with different colors. It's just like Kellogg's Fruit Loops. I saw it on the TV and they said it was really healthy." Sigh. We had a little chat (not our first either) about truth in advertising.
4. He told me his head hurt after I mentioned that I was going back to the headache doctor. He said that he needed a bag of frozen peas to make his head feel better. (We sometimes use frozen vegetables as a temporary ice pack in our house). Henry then proceeded to spend a good chunk of the afternoon and then later in the evening with a bag of Edamame placed on top of his head.

Bad hair day

1. OK, so I feel bad complaining about the temperature here when I know it is or just was hotter than 90 degrees where you live, but, I am going to complain anyway.
2. Mostly because my hair looks like Gilda Radner's after she just stuck her finger in the electric socket.
   
3. My hair is wide. Hair should be full or thick or wavy. Hair should not be wide.
   
4. It should not need its own pillow.
5. If I went to a movie theater today (not bloody likely), people would have to ask me to tamp down my tresses, or they might not be able to see the screen.
6. Usually I try to look more like Jane Curtin.